This question sounds easy and straightforward, but when faced with answering it we generally list everything that we don’t want rather than clearly defining what our heart truly desires. It is difficult to really define this for several reasons. One significant reason is that we’re used to keeping this part of ourselves a secret for fear of being judged. After all, no one wants to hear the typical unsupportive responses such as “that is not possible” or “who do you think you are?” Add to that the pressure we feel to conform to our family beliefs, as well as societies definition of what is important in life, and our ability to express our deepest desires in this way becomes virtually impossible.
So recently, I came across an interesting question from author/coach, Michael Neill, as stated in his book, You Can Have What You Want.
The question is
“What would you do if you weren’t afraid?”
This was a powerful statement for me, so it really caught my attention. What this question does is to help you eliminate all of the chatter in your mind so that you can stop and listen to your inner voice. This is the aspect of yourself that is wise; the part that always knows the truth, you just have to be willing to hear it.
Unfortunately, fear can often silence even the grandest of dreams and consequently your inner voice. Its our minds, which have a tendency to focus on the many fearful thoughts that make it seem too scary to go after our wants. In addition to fear, our minds become preoccupied with all of the logistics and the obstacles for creating our inner goals. That’s why this question is so powerful it circumvents your mind so to speak, allowing you to tune into your heart; therefore, releasing the mind from all those opposing thoughts.
You can prepare yourself to use this question by finding some time alone when you are not feeling rushed or stressed. Take out paper and write down a list of every idea that comes up without censoring anything. Its not necessary to know how possible they are at this point. Spend a few weeks doing this practice and compare your notes at the end of the month. Notice what the re-occurring theme is throughout so that you can identify what is most important to you.
Whether its changing a career, beginning a new relationship, having a healthy, fit body or spending more time enjoying life…these are just some of our goals. But when we zero in on the specifics of the goal such as choosing to be the owner of a gourmet ice cream shop or having more time to travel the world to exotic places, then our dreams really come to life.
The next step is to evaluate each intention in order to learn what your highest priority is at this time. Then proceed to go after your top goal rather than attempting to pursue several of them simultaneously. You’ll know that you have connected with your most important desire because of the feeling that it generates. This is the one that excites you and makes you go – WOW! Feeling the emotion and passion behind the goal is the driving force that propels you to take those action steps that move you ahead. Acting on your goal is essential, since dreaming about it will not make it happen.
Once you decide on the goal that you want to focus on prepare yourself to take the first step in gathering information. This is the time to explore your goal by seeking the facts and knowledge that support your desire. Commit to acquiring the skills sets that are needed to achieve your objective and then decide to take one or two action steps this week to further this learning. Consistency is key here. Rather than working on too many action steps at once and then possibly giving up altogether, its more important to pace yourself by taking continuous action steps each week no matter how small.
As you build on this process, surround yourself with a positive and supportive environment and then look forward to your success!